When Your Family Just Doesn’t Get It

When you bring a new rescue pup into your home, it is an incredibly rewarding experience (we have done it twice, and honestly, it was the best decision we made). You’re offering a second chance, a haven, and a lifetime of love. However, it’s not uncommon for these precious babies to arrive feeling shy, anxious, or overwhelmed. After all, they’ve likely experienced uncertainty, and adjusting to a new environment can be a big undertaking. Our Sammie drove 1,881.7 miles up to us from Texas. We were told he would be safe in his own crate. Sadly, this was not the case; he was in a massive 18-wheeler with the crates bungied to the wall. Not what we were hoping, because of these issues, Sam came scared of basically everything, but we wouldn’t change him for the world! 

Today, I’m dedicating our post to anyone who wants to help their new furry family member feel truly safe and comfortable in their forever home. Remember, the journey to happiness is unique, but it’s also filled with joy and hope. With a combination of unlimited patience, a positive approach, and understanding, you can help your shy rescue pup blossom.

Understanding the Shy Rescue

First, it’s important to remember that shyness and anxiety in a rescue dog are completely normal. You could see the following:

• Under-socialized: Most rescues have not had a lot of positive experiences with people, other animals, or various environments.
• Traumatized: Past neglect, abuse, or abandonment can leave lasting emotional scars (people get this, too; dogs have feelings just like us).
• Naturally timid: Just like people, some dogs are simply more introverted by nature.
• Overwhelmed: A new home, new people, new smells, and new routines can be a lot to process.

Recognizing the potential reasons behind their shyness can help you approach their integration with greater empathy. 

The Power of Patience

There’s no set timeline for when a rescue pup will fully ‘come out of their shell.’ It is very important to give them time, just like a child who is scared to jump off the bed; dogs need love, guidance, and time to feel secure.  Some may adapt in days, others in weeks, and some may take months. Remember, patience is key, and it will bring about the best results.

• Avoid forcing interaction: While it’s tempting to want to shower them with affection, a shy dog can perceive this as threatening. Let them initiate contact. Offer a gentle hand for sniffing, but don’t force petting or hugging.
• Create a safe space: Designate a quiet area just for them, like a crate with a cozy blanket, a dog bed in a corner, or a separate room. This safe space will provide them with a sanctuary where they can retreat when feeling overwhelmed, giving them a sense of security and comfort.
• Respect their boundaries: Pay close attention to their body language. Yawning, lip licking, looking away, cowering, or tail tucked are all signs of discomfort. When you see these, back off and give them space. Kids don’t always understand these signs. It’s essential to teach your children young so they know how to recognize and handle these signs, rather than getting hurt.
• Consistency is key: Establishing a formalized routine for feeding (we feed our dogs at 6 am and 4 pm – that is sharp, try not to make many changes), bathroom breaks, and playtime. Predictability helps build trust and reduces anxiety.

A Positive Approach: Building Trust and Confidence

While patience is the foundation, positive reinforcement is the building material for your dog’s confidence.

• Positive associations: Everything good should come from you. Which should include food, treats, toys, and gentle praise. When they choose to approach you, even for a moment, reward them generously. 
• Gentle introduction to new things: Introduce new people, pets, or environments slowly and calmly. If meeting new people, ask them to ignore the dog initially and let the dog approach when ready. Some people cannot understand this task. If your dog needs this, make sure to explain this many times. 
• Use high-value treats: Find out what motivates your dog the most – smelly cheese, cooked chicken, special dog treats – and use these for training and positive reinforcement. Each dog is different. Ellie LOVES food, but Sam LOVES affection, kisses, and pets. Be sure to find the best one for your dogs. 
• Keep interactions low-pressure: Don’t pressure them into situations they’re uncomfortable with. If they seem hesitant about a walk, try a shorter route or just spend time in the backyard. We also play with the dogs for a bit before walking them, which encourages them to poop before the walk, so they aren’t too excited. 
• Engage in calm activities: Gentle play with a soft toy, quiet walks in low-traffic areas, or simply sitting near them while you read can all be beneficial for building connection without pressure.
• Consider “treat and retreat”: For timid dogs, place a treat a few feet away from them, then walk away. This allows them to approach the treat at their own pace without feeling threatened by your presence. Over time, you can gradually decrease the distance when they feel better.
• Celebrate small victories: Did they wag their tail for a second? Did they eat a treat from your hand? Did they come out from under the table? Acknowledge and celebrate every small step forward.

When to Seek Professional Help

If your dog’s anxiety or shyness is severe, impacting their quality of life, or if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Please don’t hesitate to seek professional help (sometimes this is needed)- it’s the best thing for your family. A certified professional dog trainer (not just YouTube videos – you can start here, but it might not be the best approach for both of you) or a veterinarian can provide tailored strategies and support. This can help you understand your dog’s specific needs and develop a comprehensive plan; you must work together. 

The Reward of a Blossoming Pup

Helping a shy rescue pup blossom takes time, dedication, and a lot of love. But the reward is immeasurable. Witnessing a once-timid dog transform into a confident, happy, and loving member of your family is one of the most fulfilling experiences any pet owner can have.

Embrace the journey, be present for their needs, and remember that every small step forward is a testament to your patience and their growing trust. Your forever home is not just a place; it’s a feeling of safety, comfort, and unconditional love that you are so generously providing.

Sending you strength and a whole lot of happiness,

Maddie